Price: $1.99
Serving: 1/2 package, or ¾ cups
Calories: 250 per serving
Fat: 14%, 9g
Cholesterol: 0%, 0mg
Sodium: 27%, 650mg
Protein: 4g
Carbohydrates: 13%, 38g
Fiber: 0%, >1g
Sugar: 2g
Weight Watchers Points: 6 POINTS per half box

Trader Ming’s (Joe’s) says: Our green curry meal features a richly flavored green curry sauce made with creamy coconut milk and fragrant spices, then paired with a mix of veggies, including baby corn and mushrooms. Each package contains jasmine rice to complete the meal.

Our Trader Ming’s Rice Boxes are inspired by the exotic flavors found in Thai cuisine. Now you can experience the sweet and spicy flavors of Thailand in just minutes. Just about two minutes in fact.

Maggie says: Oh, Trader Joe’s. Even your copy is funny.

A little background: It’s overstatement to say I have a love-hate relationship with the Trader Ming’s series of trapezoidal-shaped noodles-in-a-box lunches. It’s more that our relationship is “meh”. I was excited when they were first introduced, as I was vegan at the time, and so were the noodle boxes! And they were cheap—well, cheaper than the name-brand version. Kismet! And then, after I consumed several—perhaps dozens—of Trader Ming’s noodle boxes, I was pretty over it. They’re too sweet for me, like much Americanized Thai food. But I when saw this new flavor, I was intrigued again. I love green curry sauce, as a rule, and I even like the Trader Joe’s version of green curry sauce, and so I thought I would give this a shot.

On opening the box and the packages, I was reminded of the huge strides processed food has taken. How can they make packaged rice with just the right flavor and texture? When I can’t even make it that well at home? The green curry sauce, unheated, was less impressive. It was more gray than green and had that funny metallic scent common in packaged sauces. However, as I was mixed up the sauce and the rice, a little sauce got on my spoon—the directions say to use a fork, but I’m a rebel like that—and I licked it, and…hmmm. Tangy. Lemongrassy. This might be excellent, I thought.

And it was — in spite of me boiling the heck out of it. When you heat shelf stable meals, remind yourself: this stuff is already cooked. You are not cooking it, or defrosting it; you are simply heating it so that you will enjoy it more. No need to blast it up to “thermonuclear”.

On to the food: Someone at Trader Joe’s obviously heard my complaints about too sweet Thai food, because this green curry sauce is not too sweet at all. It has a little kick—they weren’t shy on the green chili paste—and the kaffir lime leaves are strongly represented, which is excellent as that is one of my favorite Thai ingredients. The coconut milk gives it a nice depth of flavor. In short, this is real food—it’s as good as anything you’d find in a restaurant. The problem: I gave it three and a half stars (we no longer allow half stars on Heat Eat Review, so I moved this to 4 stars - Ed.) because there are nowhere near enough veggies or sauce, so what I ended up eating was excellently-flavored rice with a few bamboo shoots. And I took this shortage personally, because every sauce-soaked vegetable was so darn tasty.

Update: I’m only moderately full after eating the Trader Joe’s Jasmine Green Curry, but it seems like the somewhat-full feeling will stick around for awhile. That’s the good news. The bad news is, I found a whole chunk of rice at the bottom that hadn’t even been touched by the sauce. Not NEAR enough sauce here, Trader Joe’s!

Price: $3.19 (or free because I had a coupon for a free meal)
Serving: 1 oz.
Calories: 260 per serving
Fat: 14%, 9g
Cholesterol: 0%, 0mg
Sodium: 29%, 700mg
Protein: 7g
Carbohydrates: 14%, 42g
Fiber: 32%, 8g
Sugar: 8g
Weight Watchers Points: 5

Kashi says: All Natural Tuscan Veggie Bake. Yellow squash, roasted eggplant, red onion, and sweet potato. Zesty basil tomato sauce with sun dried tomatoes served inside Kashi seven whole grain noodles.

Samantha says: Kashi, what happened? I love your pizza, cereal, and tasty granola bars and then you come out with this?!

First, the cooking time on this meal is a little long and complicated to be taking over the office microwave-a total of 11 minutes! Bake for 5 minutes at 50% power, heat an additional 3 minutes at full power, let stand in microwave for 3 minutes. I don’t know about anyone else’s office politics, but taking over the microwave for 11 minutes leads to your name being dropped at the water cooler around here.

I took the fully cooked and rested meal back to my desk, carefully peeling back the plastic sheet. It looked like any other frozen “lasagna” based noodle frozen meal-square with sauce on top. It smelled good. The veggies had the “fire roasted” lines. The red sauce was plentiful and thick.

I have to say I was excited to try this meal. I have heard wonderful things about Kashi frozen meals “texture, flavor, nutritious!” and I love everything else they make. Oh this had texture all-right. I took my plastic fork and cut my first bite of the noodles and veggies, placed it in my mouth. The meal was pleasant and flavorful. I could taste the fire-roasted and the intense tomato sauce. Then I began to chew. All I kept thinking was “What is that hard pebble feeling in my mouth?” I turned over the box and read the label among the ingredients, all the way at the bottom, “brown lentils”. I am a big lentil fan, love to cook with them and eat them…however I prefer mine fully cooked, not in crunchy, partially cooked form.

Just seconds later there was another strange texture, chewy and yet soft. This I discover is the eggplant. I am not convinced eggplant should be anywhere near a microwave, but there it was, sandwiched between two whole grain noodles. The noodles were a bit chewy for my taste. The most surprising part of the entire meal was the mysterious white, cream sauce I found in the meal. I went back to the ingredients to investigate. I believe it was the “cannellini beans” in some form. Not too sure.

Overall, I was not impressed by the Kashi Tuscan Bake and feel let down. I gave it two stars because I am full, but will not be purchasing this one again.

Price: $3.99
Serving: 1 Pocket, 4.5oz.
Calories: 180 per serving
Fat: 9%, 6g
Cholesterol: 0%, 0mg
Sodium: 22%, 520mg
Protein: 11g
Carbohydrates: 8%, 23g
Fiber: 2%, <1g
Sugar: 2g
Weight Watchers Points: 4 Points

Amy’s Kitchen says: Amy’s grandma (Nonny) eats scrambled tofu and toast for breakfast every morning. To make the tofu look good and taste great, she adds golden turmeric and bits of sautéed organic vegetables…onions, shiitake mushrooms and sweet peppers. Our whole family enjoys this dish so much that we figured our customers would too. In order to make it convenient and easy to eat, we’ve used the tofu scramble as a filling for a new pocket sandwich. Now all Amy’s grandma has to do is pop a Tofu Scramble Pocket Sandwich into her toaster oven.

Mimi says: Wait, hold on a second. Maybe it’s because I’m not a Californian, but I’ve never heard of a tofu-eating granny. My grandma made roast beef every Sunday and woe to me if I did not revel in her omelets.

Amy’s product descriptions always make me laugh. Is there never a time when they just sat down and went “Hmm…the numbers are showing positive sales with our breakfast pocket line, let’s expand it.” ?

So, Amy’s Tofu Scramble Pocket Sandwich. This puppy is the same size as her feta pocket, but without cheese it’s a whole lot leaner. Again like her feta pocket, it’s simple to make—just pop it in the microwave for 2 minutes. Within seconds my dorm room took on the pleasant aroma of home-cooked breakfast.

Upon first bite, I encountered a terrific surprise. It tastes like egg! I’m a tofu novice, and even though I’ve heard tofu can be made to taste like anything, I never quite believed it. This scrambled tofu, however, perfectly mimics eggs for taste and texture. The peppers and mushrooms are not super strong, but complement the flavor nicely. The taste has more of a tang than I expected, as Amy’s foods can be a little bland sometimes.

Then, all too soon, it was over. That would be my one complaint. At 180 calories, it’s not a caloric spleen-buster, but it still felt on the small side for what was supposed to be a fairly balanced breakfast. I would at minimum need some fruit to feel satisfied from this meal. Though 520 milligrams of sodium isn’t huge for frozen food, it still feels like it should be lower for the amount of food I put in my gullet. I rarely even count sodium, but this thought made me notice it.

Overall though, Amy’s Tofu Scramble is a healthy little pocket. No saturated fat is a huge plus, not to mention just 6 grams of the regular stuff. Virtually no sugar and 11 grams of protein are a good mix. The pocket also knocks off 20% of the recommended Vitamin C intake. More fiber would have been nice, but I guess that is what the fruit I ate afterwards was for. Ignore the price, as I bought it at my school’s overpriced minimart.

Amy’s Kitchen Tofu Scramble in a Pocket Sandwich falls short of breakfast perfection, but it offers up a good main dish for days when you grave a bit of pepper and egg but can’t get to a skillet. Just be sure to bring along an apple.

Price: $10.79
Serving: 1/5 a Tofurky, 5oz.
Calories: 250
Fat: 9%, 6g
  Saturated Fat: 0%, 0g
  Trans Fat: 0%, 0g
Sodium: 21%, 510mg
Protein: 34g
Carbs: 4%, 13g
Fiber: 8%, 2g
Weight Watchers Points: 5 Points

Tofurky says: The Tofurky Roast is a pre-cooked vegetarian feast designed to be the delicious centerpiece of your holiday or everyday meal. Made from a revolutionary tofu-wheat protein blend, Tofurky is known for its incredible, turkey-like texture and flavor.

Heather says: First, a confession. For all the years I’ve spent being a veggie, I have resisted the Tofurky. I’m not sure if it had to do with the name (and ensuing jokes from non-veggie friends) or the idea of a vegetable product trying to be a meat product. Whatever the reason, I’ve snubbed this product for years. This year, however, I decided to finally make amends.

Far from home and sharing Thanksgiving with other veggies for the first time, I thus bought this product and dutifully followed the directions. Now, lest you think this is a pop in the microwave kinda deal, please be warned: it requires baking and preparation. In fact, it felt (and smelled) much like a regular Thanksgiving around my tiny studio. The directions advise including a few chopped veggies, basting, and baking for a little over an hour. I complied, as the picture above might attest.

Far more telling might be the picture below, however. When the feast was done, there were but two tiny pieces left. All in all, the mighty Tofurky was a raging success. All the other veggies and I were impressed, and even the omnivores amongst us were pleased with the taste. Turkey-like? Ehh, not exactly. However, it was delicious for what it is: a Tofurky. If you’re looking for an alternative to poultry, or are catering to vegans or vegetarians this holiday season, I highly recommend this product. Your friends (and the turkeys) will thank you.

Oh, and for those veggies still missing the aesthetic of the bird, I give you: The Tofurky Disguise Kit. Enjoy.