Quaker Oatmeal Express Cinnamon Roll

November 18, 2006 | Reviewer: Abi

Quaker Oatmeal Express cinnamon Roll

Price: $1.89
Serving: 1 cup, 1.9 oz. plus water
Calories: 200
Fat: 4%, 2.5g
Sodium: 10%, 250mg
Protein: 5g
Carbs: 14%, 41g
Fiber: 15%, 4g

Quaker Express says: Each cup of Oatmeal Express is filled with the tantalizing flavor of fresh baked cinnamon rolls and the same heart healthy fiber found in Standard Quaker Oats.

Abi says: Fiber? Check. Tantalizing flavor of fresh baked cinnamon rolls? Not so much. I understand that companies need to jazz up their products with descriptions that use words like ‘tantalizing’, but I’d appreciate a little more honesty. Perhaps something like “Inspired by fresh baked cinnamon rolls”. I’d accept that. FILLED with the flavor? Well, it certainly is full of sugar. So much sugar that it would appeal strongly to small children who aren’t put off by porridge-y foods (Malt-o-Meal, Cream of Wheat, etc.)

This is the most cinnamon-y oatmeal I’ve ever consumed. In fact, while consuming the oatmeal I contemplated possible alterations that would allow Quaker to tone down the cinnamon and still call it tantalizing.

I first imagined the addition of a frosting packet to the package. Unfortunately, this would be the only flavor that would contain a frosting packet, thus requiring a change to what I am sure is a complicated manufacturing process. Second, would somewhat health-conscious adults (and parents) purchase a frosting-containing oatmeal? Okay, okay, there are thos jam ones out there, but at least you can halfway convince yourself that it is fruit. This would be frosting: a shelf-stable mixture of sugar and butter. Not a plus for people who are trying to be a bit healthy in the first place by consuming oatmeal.

Fortunately for consumers everywhere, it is not my job to figure out how to market oatmeal.