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Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.~Doug Larson

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Lean Cuisine Cheese Lasagna with Chicken Scaloppini

May 19, 2006 | Reviewer: Nicole

Price: $2.50 (on sale)
Serving: 1 tray, 10 oz.
Calories: 280
Fat: 12%, 8g
Sodium: 24%, 580mg
Protein: 19g
WW Points: 6 Winning Points
Diet Exchanges: 2 Lean Meat, 2 Starch, 1/2 other carbohydrate

Lean Cuisine says: Chicken breast scallopini topped with a robust tomato sauce accented with basil,onion and garlic. Served with hand- layered three-cheese lasagna rich with ricotta, romano and parmesan cheeses.

Nicole says: They say everything tastes like chicken. Those involved in the wild world of frozen foods know differently – something tasting like chicken is a big boost, especially if it’s called chicken. I was pleased with the slightly detectable chicken-y taste of the two tiny patties included with this meal. They were served in a tomato sauce, however, and of course this is a Lean Cuisine tomato sauce, so though it’s readily identifiable as such, it is awfully bland. “Basil, onion, and garlic?” Ha.

Moving on to the lasagna, the tomato sauce might be the highlight (awfully bland,) as this “three-cheese” lasagna has a little bit of something that LOOKS like cheese in between two bland pasta sheets (soft in the center, hard around the edges), but it doesn’t taste like much of anything. Lasagna is Italian for “lots of cheese”, so there is some huge misrepresentation going on here. I am fed up with Lean Cuisine, and if I didn’t still have two more in the freezer from the last sale at Safeway, I’d proclaim that I am never again eating a Lean Cuisine Meal.

Amy’s Kitchen Mattar Paneer

May 18, 2006 | Reviewer: Jess

Price: $3.48
Serving: 1 tray, 10 oz.
Calories: 320
Fat: 13%, 8g
Cholesterol: 1%, 5mg
Sodium: 32%, 780mg
Protein: 11g
Carbs: 18%, 54g
Fiber: 25%, 6g
WW Points: 6 Points

Amy’s Kitchen says: Tender organic peas and Indian cheese in an authentic delicately spiced sauce. Golden carrots, onions and cumin add flavor and color to the organic basmati rice. Curried chana masala made with organic garbanzo beans and sweet tomatoes round out this delicious meal.

Jess says: There are so few constants in life, but my Safeway always has Amy’s Mattar Paneer in stock. This is a good thing. This is my “go to” meal when I know I’m looking forward to rough waves on the sea of life. I know that this meal will at least guarantee a happy lunching experience and sometimes that’s enough of an incentive to keep on keeping on. I said approximately this to Abi when I sat down to eat this meal and she replied, “that’s really sad”. I gathered from her tone that she meant sad as in pathetic.

Maybe she’s right.

But sometimes it’s Monday and some woman on the Metro during morning rush hour complained that you were standing too close to her (as if you had an alternative!) and your boss calls you into his office before you have had your first cup of coffee and its been almost thunderstorming for days and you remember at various points throughout the day that you need more money than you currently have. On days like this, I can heat up some Mattar Paneer (only 4 minutes, no stirring necessary!) which is so thoughtfully subdivided into three triangles of food groupings. I can mix the flavorful explosion of pea sauce with the basmati rice. Or throw in some garbanzo beans for a triumvirate of taste. Or I can just munch on that Indian cottage cheese ala carte so I can savor that soft cheesy savoriness. The permutations are endless (except, well, mathematically they are not) and everything is warm and delicious and slightly spicy, but not uncomfortably so. Great rice to sauce ratio! My only complaint is that the bowl is ill-equipped to hold the contents and tends to buckle under the weight of the meal. But a simple plate under the bowl will add the sound structure that you will need to fully enjoy this meal, and thusly, survive your day.

Oh, and if food blogs were to have a thesis statement, then this blog’s might be that Indian food (compared to other food types) is most adaptable to microwave preparation.

Tasty Bite Punjab Eggplant

May 18, 2006 | Reviewer: Kate

Price: $3.29
Serving: 1/2 pack, 5 oz.
Calories: 144
Fat: 14%, 9g
Sodium: 21%, 515mg
Carbs: 4%, 13g
Fiber: 8%, 2g
Protein: 4g

Vegan, Kosher, Gluten-Free

Tasty Bite says: Braised eggplant cooked in a distinctively flavored sauce.

Kate says: I love eggplant in almost all forms, so I thought that the Tasty Bite Punjab Eggplant would be an easy win for a quick lunch. Unfortunately the so-called “distinctively flavored sauce” is oily, and although pleasantly spicy, lacking flavor. If I wrote the descriptive sentence for this dish it would be: Spicy eggplant mush with bland, oily sauce. As I write this, I think that spicy and bland seem to be mutually exclusive, but this dish proves otherwise: it heats up my mouth without pleasing my taste buds. The package is two servings, and after eating both servings in about six minutes, I discovered that they are probably right and I should have stopped eating after one serving. Two servings cause slight discomfort.

I will eat Punjab Eggplant again if it is available and I am hungry, but I will not go out of my way for it.

Lean Cuisine Cheese Lasagna with Chicken Scaloppini

May 17, 2006 | Reviewer: Abi

Price: $2.50 (on sale)
Serving: 1 tray, 10 oz.
Calories: 280
Fat: 12%, 8g
Sodium: 24%, 580mg
Protein: 19g
WW Points: 6 Winning Points
Diet Exchanges: 2 Lean Meat, 2 Starch, 1/2 other carbohydrate

Lean Cuisine says: Chicken breast scallopini topped with a robust tomato sauce accented with basil,onion and garlic. Served with hand- layered three-cheese lasagna rich with ricotta, romano and parmesan cheeses.

Abi says: Lean Cuisine’s chicken scaloppini is the white-meat version of chicken-fried steak. Substitute runny tomato sauce for gravy and you’ve got yourself a main course. I must have been very hungry, because I managed to ignore the soggy breading and tasteless chicken and eat this meal in less than five minutes. Ok, I didn’t eat the hardened, yet rubbery chunks of lasagna that had been superglued to the plastic tray, but I did eat ALL of the chicken, two patties about the size of Wendy’s Hamburger Jrs.

What’s the ‘take-home’ from today’s lesson? Breaded items and microwaves are not friends. The meal deserves only two stars, which puts it in the same class as Stouffer’s Fish and Thai Kitchen Pad Thai. If you’re looking for a good Lean Cuisine meal, I suggest Orange Peel Chicken or Sweet and Sour Chicken.